For Real

It is hard to believe I have been blogging since the first Wednesday in January making this my     blog; I had an extra one before the very first one.  The original purpose was just to keep me focused on my goals, an accountability method.   Since then it has become so much more than just that to me. 

I have learned first that I have some pretty amazing friends and family who have not only answered my call for accountability but have been a wealth of encouragement.  They have lifted me up and given me a since of accomplishment.  Some have boasted so that I fear my head will grow.  What a feeling to have people in your life like that.  Each week I can’t wait until Wednesday to post.  Yes, I hate to admit it but I love to be bragged on.  If we are all serious and transparent I would say we all do.  I used to fake modesty but I’m done with fake.

I have learned that I do have something to offer.  I have a lot of experience in my nearly 50 years and have truly lived.  I have experienced true fear in a war bunker, pride in my college graduation, love in my marriage, happiness in the birth of my children, sorrow in the death of parent, confusion in a battling church, loneliness in a bottle and joy in my Jesus.

I have also learned that I will keep learning.  This blog has had me question and explore why I think, feel and do.  A dissection of thoughts and terms and philosophy has me delving into life full on, bringing my art, beliefs and goals into the forefront  of who I am.

Lastly, I now know my challenges and victories are not just mine.  We all now share in them.  I am still challenged by my daunting life schedule that continues to digress as I help my family care for a dying family member.  That and my job is, at times, crowding me. Both leaving me with little time for anything else.  However, in victory I have found a loving and supportive network that amazes me.  That group of family and friends (those lines blurr) have given me the drive to learn how to swim and to finish a five year project in the midst of this.  So I won’t be running a triathlon this spring, it will wait.  After all I am only 49 and a half.  Thanks for reading, encouraging, loving and just being.  See you next week.

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